Sunday, December 13, 2009

My Week In Tweets: December 6 - December 12

No. That's not my ankle hurting after a night of dancing. Because that would be ironic/wrong/a kick in the effing balls #halfmarathonin6days
10:24 AM Dec 6th from web

Managed to get my work done and have decided to bake. Because nothing says I am a functioning, productive member of society like cookies.
1:31 PM Dec 6th from web

And brownies.
1:39 PM Dec 6th from web

Just checked my air filter and added bleach to the pump on my furnace. I don't know quite what it all means but Holy Hell I feel productive!
1:49 PM Dec 6th from web

Take that Mrs. Fields!
2:29 PM Dec 6th from TwitPic

My house should *always* smell this good. Sigh.
2:59 PM Dec 6th from web

Apparently I'm channeling Betty Crocker today.
3:21 PM Dec 6th from TwitPic

Alright honey - your knowledge of football is impressive. Just not *that* impressive. #giveitup
7:06 PM Dec 6th from UberTwitter

Sumo: cornbread are square. Pi(e) be round.
8:37 PM Dec 6th from UberTwitter

Sumo: A parade that doesn't have lawn mowers or horses isn't worth shit. #suckitmacys
9:17 PM Dec 6th from UberTwitter

Don't "Hi Baby" me you fur-lined-leather-jacket wearing freak.
10:29 PM Dec 6th from UberTwitter

And I think I'm ready for Chicago in February? #holyhellitseffingcold
10:39 PM Dec 6th from UberTwitter

Wondering if the fact that might my toilet *nearly* overflowed and what - me w/out a plunger - is some sort of sign. Really Universe? #FML
8:08 AM Dec 7th from web

I'm too tired to be tested today so thanks for giving me a break.
8:09 AM Dec 7th from web

Dear Magazine Subscription Peeps: Please don't call me at 8:20am on a Monday morning when I am already late and scrambling to get ready. Thx
8:27 AM Dec 7th from web

Who knew that December 7th was National Asshat Driver Day? I didn't.
11:09 AM Dec 7th from UberTwitter

In some states it's also called Can't Drive Worth a Fuckstick Driver Day.
11:11 AM Dec 7th from UberTwitter

Favorite wine of the wine tasting? Nasty Racy. Go figure.
7:15 PM Dec 7th from UberTwitter

Breaking a wine glass sober just feels like the wrong way to start my day.
7:35 AM Dec 8th from web

Shopping with the Compliance Queen. J Crew outlet. Discount shoes. My heart is racing......
11:50 AM Dec 8th from UberTwitter

Meeting @moriartytth for an early afternoon civiled cocktail. It's a good day.
4:31 PM Dec 8th from UberTwitter

You know what else made it a good day? A Sloppy Jai and Masala Fries at Chai Pati in Asheville. That shit was awesome!
4:32 PM Dec 8th from UberTwitter

Can I legitimately justify carbo-loading 5 days before my race?
6:58 PM Dec 8th from UberTwitter

So clearly my delicate gastrointestinal system did something to piss off the Indian food I had for lunch b/c OMG Does. Not. Agree. With. Me.
7:37 PM Dec 8th from web

#twitHER is taking on a life of its own. Welcome @saraashmansmith @sarahlena @aisforaardvark & @pseudostoops to the bar. I mean - the fray.
7:43 PM Dec 8th from web

Just found out that our mid-quarter email update was sent to 800+ people this morning with a typo. FML. Actually - DOUBLE FML.
9:19 AM Dec 9th from web

Can I go back to bed now please???
9:19 AM Dec 9th from web

How the Hell am I almost out of toilet paper? #shoppingfail
10:06 AM Dec 9th from UberTwitter

$9.69 for toilet paper. Damn my ass is high maintenance.
11:08 AM Dec 9th from UberTwitter

Just brought brownies to my neighbors. #ilovesmalltownlife
12:12 PM Dec 9th from web

Forced to watch Judge Pirro while waiting for my car to be serviced. OMFG where do they find *these* people?
2:06 PM Dec 9th from UberTwitter

Over 20 RSVPs to my holiday fete. Awesome b/c OMG - friends! WHEE! But Holy Hell - wee little house. Where will they all go?
2:11 PM Dec 9th from UberTwitter

Who the Hell goes hotrodding in a Lincoln?
2:30 PM Dec 9th from UberTwitter

So relieved Judge Pirro and her merry band of sadsack fuck-ups are off. But The Doctors? Seriously? #sofuckingtortured
3:02 PM Dec 9th from UberTwitter

I just love getting holiday cards and seeing photos of all my friends' insanely adorable and gorgeous kids!
4:24 PM Dec 9th from UberTwitter

Sumo and The Kaiser have me out for a *civilized* farewell cocktail. Oh boys....
4:47 PM Dec 9th from UberTwitter

New dress ordered specifically for holiday party doesn't zip. #fml
8:22 PM Dec 9th from web

Maybe I shouldn't have ordered fries tonight....
8:23 PM Dec 9th from web

Dear Mom & Dad: I know how tired I look. I know b/c I feel this tired too. Please don't feel compelled to point it out. C u soon. xo Rougie
6:42 AM Dec 10th from web

Race anxiety + MASSIVE PMS = Rougie is a slight emotional basketcase.
11:34 AM Dec 10th from UberTwitter

All I've consumed today is 48oz of Coke Zero. This can't be helping my anxiety.
12:18 PM Dec 10th from UberTwitter

Meanwhile, my reward for PMS from Hell is 3 days in heaven...I mean - The Sanctuary. OMG LUXURY SWALLOW ME WHOLE.
5:39 PM Dec 10th from web

Oooohhh! A mini-bar! I didn't know they still existed!
6:04 PM Dec 10th from UberTwitter

Also - I didn't know that you could legally charge $3.75 for a 1.69-oz bag of M&Ms.
6:06 PM Dec 10th from UberTwitter

There's a phone in the water closet, a seat in the shower and a view of the ocean from the tub. #diedandgonetoheaven
6:29 PM Dec 10th from UberTwitter

Carbo loading officially began at breakfast. I'll play this card All. Day. Long.
9:51 AM Dec 11th from web

Half Marathon retail ROCKS!!!
10:41 AM Dec 11th from UberTwitter

Carbo-loading is awesome. Just ate my weight in papardelle. #runrougierun
8:48 PM Dec 11th from UberTwitter

Homemade chocolate chip cookies on my pillow. God I love this place.
9:11 PM Dec 11th from UberTwitter

(In my best Chandler Bing voice): Could this weather BE any suckier? Cold AND raining? Eff you too weather peeps.
5:44 AM Dec 12th from UberTwitter

That said, I am getting ready to KICK KIAWAH'S ASS. Eat my dust. #runrougierun
5:45 AM Dec 12th from UberTwitter

Thanks to all for the Hanukah and Half-Marathon well-wishes. I love y'all too. Xoxo
5:46 AM Dec 12th from UberTwitter

For those who care - @MarshallKarp will be Tweeting my progress with the hashtag #runrougierun
7:27 AM Dec 12th from UberTwitter

Dear Weather Peeps: Thanks for holding off on the rain (so far). I love you too! Xoxo Rougie #runrougierun
7:28 AM Dec 12th from UberTwitter

Since I couldn't race and Tweet, Dad graciously stepped in to pick up the slack:

@rougeneck almost ready for the big kiawah half marathon. Hair & makeup people just doing last minute touchups. #runrougierun
7:29 AM Dec 12th from Tweetie

@rougeneck checking out the other runners. She's the only one wearing Manolo Blahniks. Booyah!!! #runrougierun
7:35 AM Dec 12th from Tweetie

@rougeneck on the start line w/the 8 min milers. I'm on the start line for old guys w/one knee and a walker. #runrougierun
7:41 AM Dec 12th from Tweetie

@rougeneck has been training for 5 months. So how come when the starter's gun went off she screamed WTF was that? #runrougierun
8:00 AM Dec 12th from Tweetie

@rougeneck probably at mile 3 by now. Mom and Dad definitely in hotel dining room scarfing down breakfast. #runrougierun #eatdaddyeat
8:29 AM Dec 12th from Tweetie

Trouble for @rougeneck at Mile 6 -- Tiger Woods jumped out of the bushes and hit on her. #runrougierun
8:57 AM Dec 12th from web

@rougeneck set two goals for herself for this race: finish in under 2 hours and become a trending topic on Twitter #runrougierun
9:00 AM Dec 12th from web

@rougeneck update: Winners about to cross the finish line. Here they come. One man, one woman. Never mind--it's the Salahis. #runrougierun
9:03 AM Dec 12th from web

@rougeneck looking good at Mile 7. Only thing that can slow her down is her knee or if she spots a shoe sale along the way. #runrougierun
9:10 AM Dec 12th from web

@rougeneck looking strong. @marshallkarp hit the wall after that lame shoe sale joke. #runrougierun
9:22 AM Dec 12th from web

@rougeneck just stopped at the water table, ordered a Gatorade Cosmo. #runrougierun
9:23 AM Dec 12th from web

@rougeneck made quick stop to upload new recipe to her blog. back in the race. #runrougierun
9:27 AM Dec 12th from web

@rougeneck in homestretch now. Probably dreaming of that first cold beer. And fame. Oodle and oodles of fame. #runrougierun
9:47 AM Dec 12th from Tweetie

@rougeneck crossed finish line and then -- no joke -- disappeared into the crowd. #runrougierun
10:17 AM Dec 12th from Tweetie


1:59:48 KISS MY ASS KIAWAH #runrougierun
10:17 AM Dec 12th from UberTwitter

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