Monday, August 31, 2009

Now I Know How Elastigirl Feels

These days, I feel like I am living my life as a superhero. By day, I have a high-enough-level-corporate job (It says "Director of..." on my business card so I must be kind of important) for a conservative firm in a conservative industry in a conservative part of the world. By night, I am a social networking and blogging queen with a mouth like a sailor and an occasional tendency to Tweet under the influence.

Right now, these are 2 very separate worlds. In fact, they are 2 entirely separate universes. Work peeps do not know about the Cyber Me. They don't know about my blog. They don't know about my Twitter. I won't even be friends with them on Facebook because yeah - I totally pimp my blog through Facebook and the truth of the matter is, the thing I fear most in this world (aside from raw chicken, being buried alive and losing my parents) is work peeps finding out about the blog. Once it becomes a book, then we can let them in on the secret.

Here's my main concern: for every respectable dinner party I chronicle, there's also a slightly debaucherous theme party not too mention suggesting that a cocktail father my children. Oh. And the language. Let's not forget about my salty speech patterns. I am pretty sure that "Directors of" who work in conservative industries in conservative geographies don't sound like a cross between Betty Ford and Joe Pesci in Goodfellas.

And so, I live in this semi-state of quasi panic about what would happen if these 2 universes were to collide. For a while it was full on throes of panic but then my dear friend The Banker, who is someone I know professionally but who is also one of the very few to have crossed the boundary into my Cyber World, basically talked me off the ledge and told me that blogging/being on Facebook/Tweeting is not illegal and that I what I write about is basically harmless and that there's absolutely no connection between the "Professional Me" and the "Cyber Me" and that I shouldn't worry. Since she is so sage and so wise and such a good influence, I listened. Basically. Although my personal levels of neuroticism probably qualify me for a starring role in Woody Allen's next film so yeah...I still worry. Just not as much.

Anyways, the reason I am sharing this with you dear readers: I am going on a 3-day work retreat this week up in the mountains. Me and the work peeps will be bonding, interacting, hiking, running, biking, hanging out on the lake, and enjoying the cool mountain air for 3 whole days. At some point, I think there is a half day "meeting" but this is pretty much about the socializing and the hanging out. It's not about working. Which brings up the question: if I am at a 3 day retreat in the mountains that's all about hanging with my co-workers, why the fuck would I bring a laptop??? Seriously. Especially if I have my Crackberry.

From the work peep perspective, I am pretty sure the presence of a laptop would make absolutely no sense. Unless it would make me look like a total workaholic bad ass. Hmmm...something to consider...But really - I can't emphasize enough how much this trip is about relaxing and having fun and not about working.

However, the Cyber Me needs her fix: there's this blog, the 30+ blogs I follow and dutifully try to comment on (OMG sometimes the weight of unread posts on Google reader just CRUSHES me), Twitter, Facebook, goes on. And while I can manage some of these things from my Crackberry (Note to the good folks at Twitterberry: it would be oh so useful if you could actually FOLLOW a tweep from Twitterberry - dontcha think?), until I bite the bullet and buy an iPhone (so on my To Do List), I still need a laptop. So I wrestled with this for a few days. I really did. To bring a laptop or not to bring a laptop. And then I mentally kicked myself because OMG: can I not go on a laptop diet for a few days? Can I not disengage the Cyber Me for approximately 72 hours?

And then I had a genius solution. I would bring my personal laptop which has my iTunes on it because I am sure with all of the mountain jogging I plan on doing, I will need to recharge my iPod at least once. Right? And while I am charging my iPod if I happen to dive into my own personal cyber universe...Of course, as clever as I thought I was being, I still kind of felt like a douchey asshole because once again, OMG: can I not go on a laptop diet for a few days? Can I not disengage the Cyber Me for approximately 72 hours?

Now all of this turned out to be a non-issue because my co-worker who is organizing the trip emailed me the other day asking me if I was bringing a laptop because we need one to run a presentation during the one working part of the trip. I guess it's naturally assumed that, for whatever reason, I would be the type of girl to bring my laptop to a mountain retreat. And I'm ok with that. So even if I hadn't come up with my whole genius iTunes cover, I would have effectively been given a legitimate reason to bring my laptop along.

So yeah. I'll be up in the mountains, communing with nature, bonding with the work peeps, relaxing, updating my Facebook status, blogging (actually - I don't have to blog tomorrow because I have a SUPER FANTASTICALLY KICK ASS GUEST POSTER! WHOO!), and probably Tweeting about it because that's how I roll, yo.

If that ain't a cross between country and a more than slight cyber addiction, I'll kiss your...

PS I wrote this entire post in bed. Gotta love Wi-Fi. Sigh.


kyooty said...

My family doesn't know I blog, there are a few bloggers on my FB but I've told them, I dont' talk about my blog on FB. I'm sure eventually it will get out so I keep it friendly for the most part. Twitter? no only a few ifriends know I tweet. ACK! Hubbie knows I tweet but doesn't get my tweets because he doesn't tweet. He wont friend my family on FB because like you he's got sailor in his tongue veins. I also think if my family knew I blogged they would think I thought entirely too much of myself. Now if it would get me doing more continuity editing for $$ well then bring it! :)

AndreAnna said...

You know where I stand on this topic.

But as far as unplugging goes, as connected as I like to be and as twitchy as I get without my iPhone, I like when theres a reason for me to stay away from a computer. I enjoy the disconnnectedness.

Shelly Overlook said...

I want to know how comfortable you are being stuck up on a mountain with work peeps for 3 days. Is it a YIKES situation or will it be enjoyable?

Nancy said...

My family doesn't know I blog and I'd like to keep it that way which is why I don't link it to my facebook or my Twitter. I don't say anything about them but they think I spend to much time on the internet as it have a blog - I can just hear them now...
I hate being disconnected from FB and Twitter to a lesser degree. It's just the way I am.
Run out and get yourself an IPhone NOW. I got mine Thursday. The $200 termination fee with Sprint and the cost of the phone, plus 2 years of insurance plus a $35 case is worth every friggin' penny.

Karen from Mentor said...

What if there's no internet in the mountains?

Honey? Honey? oh my, I think she fainted.....

harmzie said...

When it becomes illegal to be a human being and still hold a high-level position is when I will pack up and become Feral Mountain Lady (with husband and three kids in tow screaming "EXPLAIN AGAIN WHY THE HELL WE HAVE TO MOVE TO THE MOUNTAINS??"). With WiFi connection of course.

On that note, I don't advertise my blog at work, but I've not hidden it. There aren't many people who would venture into "that (this?) world" even for a look-see. Unless maybe I was talking about them. Which I don't. Usually.

Also? You can charge your iPod with an adapter. Leave the laptop at home. You'll be surprised at what you don't miss. Also also? Leave the *iPod* at home.