Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Inspired by Idol

Ok. So I sooooo wish I had live-blogged American Idol last night. I mean, I honestly found myself turning to Marty every other minute and uttering something about the genius/hilarity/insanity of the show. And I suppose that is what makes Idol truly Genius...it is this amazing cross between the utterly ridiculous, true talent, biting criticism, wacky fashion, drama, camp, sparkly eyedust (way to go Idol make-up artists - I am all about the sparkles!) and the Grand Ole Opry. I mean seriously - how could you not love it?

As for last night, here are some of my thoughts in retrospect.

My first thought was: What the Hell is Kara DioGuardi wearing? I didn't realize we were broadcasting Idol to other planets. Can someone please get this girl a stylist??? I then had another moment when Marty reminded that she went to Duke and I started wondering if she and I were ever there at the same time and what on Earth she wore to class and how does a degree from Duke lead you on the path to Idol Judgedom? And then I began to think about Ryan Seacrest and how he wound up with his career but frankly that's just too much to think about and so...

Speaking of Ryan...what's up with the tie clip Ry? I seriously had to ask Marty if I have missed something and if they (tie clips) have come back in style. Neither of us thinks so.

In watching the judges throughout the evening, I became convinced that Paula and Simon are in couples' counseling. At one point she made a comment about Simon not being respectful and her tone and word choice just smacked of psychology. Frankly, I think this is a good thing, although their twisted and tormented relationship has provided much entertainment (although not quite as much as Simon and Ryan's hate-hate thing they have going on...).

As for the performances....I'll start with my favorite. WELCOME BACK ANOOP! I will forgive you for being Tar Heel (in fact - I am delighted that NC is being represented by an educated and literate person and not another small town girl with stars in her eyes who doesn't know what calamari is...) and simply say: GENIUS. Song choice. Performance. Wardrobe. The works. I'd buy tickets to see you perform RIGHT NOW. And for the record, I may be the only person in America besides Anoop's parents who enjoyed last week's performance of Bad. Sometimes campy is good. Really.

From best to worst. Adam Lambert - that was self-indulgent, ridiculous, and practically disrespectful to the Man in Black. Somewhere, Johnny Cash is rolling over in his grave. I'd like to give you credit for being creative and original, but that was just....UGH. You deserve to go home after that mess. Really.

I don't get Megan. I don't. I really like her as a person. She seems quirky and offbeat and interesting and different...which is all good. But she has done something funky with her vocals the last 2 weeks which have just not resonated with me. Granted, she apparently had the flu last night and had come from the hospital. And for the record, tattoo sleeve aside, she looked STUNNING...but vocally, I am really confused.

Not so much with little Allison. Can we finally have a rocker chick advance on this show? For the record, I never got over Gina Glocksen getting voted off BEFORE Haley Scarnato on Season 6...

I love Danny Gokey but thought his song choice was a wee bit self-indulgent. I won't even discuss the jacket because there are no words to describe...

I am worried about Lil Rounds (and frankly - was irritated that Simon kept calling her Little. I thought THAT was disrespectful) because she and Grand Ole Opry just weren't a good fit.

I am also worried about roughneck Michael because this was HIS week and he was only so-so. Well - actually, I kind of liked his performance. And I liked that he showed personality and that he worked the crowd. Frankly, he's a whole lot better than Bucky Covington and Bucky-Boy has a record deal. But still, Simon didn't do him any favors with his critcisms. So yes, for the record, I am worried.

I thought Kris was actually very good (though not as good as Anoop-Dawg) and I think that I might finally actually remember who he is instead of turning to Marty each week and saying: which one is he again?

I don't think that Scott has the vocal chops - or if he does - we just haven't seen them yet. However, I think he'll be on the show for a while. And frankly, I felt bad for him because that whole Paula-Simon post-performance discussion about whether or not he should or shouldn't use the piano every week...it gave me a headache and I could witness the drama. He didn't even get to witness it. He just had to listen to it. If I didn't have visual aids on this show sometimes, I swear I'd go bonkers. So kudos to Scott for not self-imploding on the stage during that whole mess.

I really don't get Matt. The judges were ecstatic about his performance. Marty and I both felt only so-so about it.

And last but not least, Alexis Grace. I really agreed with Randy that Jolene was just not the right song choice. Which leads me to ask...

WHY DO THESE PEOPLE PICK THE WORST SONGS 95% OF THE TIME?

Idol needs to employ a Song Choice Coach for these kids, Seriously.

The only thing remotely Country about this post is that it was Grand Ole Opry week and Randy Travis was on the show...and he is an absolute legend. And the funniest moment of the show was probably when he heard Adam's wacky sitar-laced rendition of Ring of Fire and did everything he could to keep a straight face.

Ah Randy Travis. You are so my hero right now.

And if that ain't country, I'll kiss your...

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