Sunday, April 13, 2008

American Idol 101

Yikes! Where have I been? Couldn't even tell you. Didn't realize I had let 8 days lapse between posts. And the funny thing is I have been thinking about things I'd like to write about all week - I just haven't executed. I'd blame it on something - like lots of sunny, warm weather or something - but the truth is I think I've probably been just a tad lazy. So sorry for that - especially because I have been doing so well this year (I think) and have avoided any long absences.

Well - this morning I just have to blog about American Idol. I have been thinking about it way more than any normal human probably should and I am hoping that if I can translate the voices in my head on the subject into words on this blog than I'll feel better about the whole thing.

I'll start by flat out saying I pretty much hate all of the remaining finalists. They either bore me or annoy me and for the most part they lack star power and I can tell you right now that whoever wins (and I have a feeling I know who) will give Taylor Hicks a run for his money in the "Worst Idol Ever" category. And I’ll say right now that I was an original Taylor fan and voted for him. Oh well. Hillary Clinton originally voted to invade Iraq. We all make mistakes.

But back to my current Idol discourse. Looking at the remaining 7 contestants, here are my thoughts:

No one annoys me more than Carly, which is sort of a shame because I kind of liked her originally. I felt bad that she made it to Hollywood 2 years ago but then because of visa issues, couldn't stay in the country and missed her shot. I sort of loved that she had to go through the whole process again and that she made it and she does have a very lovely voice. But Carly has 2 - wait, make that 3 - things working against her. Mainly she has no personality. Two, she can't dress worth a shit. And three, she picks terrible songs. I don't understand why these contestants don't pick better songs. Have they not watched this show before? Do they not understand the importance of song choice? It's like the contestants on Hell' Kitchen who don't know how to make beef Wellington. If you are going to audition for that show, spend 8 hours a day for a month perfecting your Wellington techniques because eventually, you are going to have to prepare it in Hell's Kitchen. But back to Carly. No matter how well she sings, whenever she's on stage, I have no connection to her and no interest in what she's singing. I understand why her last album flopped. She'll never be a star.

Ditto for Syesha. Another technically gifted girl. A very pretty face. Pleasing demeanor and all of that. But when she sings, I am like - ok. Who cares. Next please. And once again, I was originally rooting for her. I loved that she sang the hell out of some song during Hollywood week when she had terrible laryngitis. I hated that she was in the bottom 3 in early rounds because I liked her. But courtesy of (once again) poor song choices and lack of personality or star power (she's no diva), I could care less what happens to her. In fact, I hope she goes home next week.

I was a huge fan of David Cook for a while, but then David Cook kind of out-David Cooked himself and I became bored to tears. So David is this year's Chris Daughtry - right? The edgy rocker who gives everything a fresh and modern sound? Well, I hated Daughtry the year he was on because every week he sounded the same and every week everyone loved how original he was. And I was like - ok, it's original once or twice, but 7 weeks running and it starts to lose its flair. That all said, I am now a Daughtry fan, saw him in concert, and have 2 of his songs on my iPod. So there's hope. But for now, with the exception of his totally awesome arrangement of Hello, David Cook is starting to sound repetitive in his song choices and arrangements. And oh yeah, by the way, he's not so original as most of those arrangements have been lifted from other performers.

Now to the other David. David Archuletta. He will most likely win which pains me because he's probably the least Idol-like of the group. It could have something to do with the fact that he can't even shave yet or it could have to do with the fact that he reminds me of rainbows and fairy dust and ice cream sundaes with chocolate and sprinkles and little bunnies hopping through a meadow. The kid is too fricking sweet. And while once again, he's got a great voice, unless he's singing some earnest and sappy ballad, he pretty much sucks. There. I've said it. I hate David Archuletta. Sue me.

As for Jason, I don't totally despise him, but I don't totally like him either. He's got another case of Daughtry in that every week, he comes out, and does the same thing over and over again except instead of rocking out Jason's like the mellow, guitar-strumming kid down the hall in college who you bought weed from. I do give him credit for Hallelujah, which was awesome, and the ukelele version of Somewhere Over the Rainbow which was even awesomer (take that Katherine Mcphee - Hah!) and so for those 2 performances alone, he's not totally dismal.

And then there were two. I'll be honest, I thought that Kristi Lee Cook might be this year's Haley Scarnato. But you know what, I think KLC can actually sing. I recall her audition when she killed it with Amazing Grace. I recall Hollywood week when she needed to pull it out in order to move forward and she did - again with Amazing Grace. And while she had a choppy start and made some poor song choices (we could have all done without her version of 8 Days a Week), I pretty much hate her the least of anyone and kind of hope she goes far. Although she's no Carrie Underwood. Not even close.

Which leaves us with Brooke. And I have to say, that for the most part, I actually like Brooke. I like her voice. I like that she sounds different and that she plays guitar and piano and actually seems like a proper musician. I dislike her earnestness (although she's not nearly as earnest as David A.). And I dislike the fact that she can't take any criticism without offering her own 2 cents on the subject (although most of the time she's agreeing with judges, but still - let them talk, nod, and let's move on). And it sort of freaks me out that she's so pure and good (Hello - never seen an R-rated movie? Not even one?). But for the most part, I like her. I really like her. I don't know if she's got superstar quality and I think she's too folky to be completely mainstream. But at the end of the day, Brooke White has my vote for Idol.

There. The voices in my head have been laid to rest. Now maybe I can go back to sleep (after I let my donkey out of course).

And if that ain't country, I'll kiss your...


Linda said...

DArn!! I actually thought you were going to talk about the Michael Johns scandal and how cruel Ryan Seacrest was!! My eye candy is gone from the show now.

David Cook - I still like.
Carly - Send her home
Syesha - Send her home
Jason - Boring - pretty eyes
David A - Boring Boring Boring does he know anything upbeat and happy?
KLC - Send her home - Sorry not a country fan
Brooke - She too is boring

I like people who can sing a beautiful ballad and can toally rock out also.

Anonymous said...

But Country Girl, the real question is, do you VOTE for your American Idol(s)?

I regretably did not think my tiny little single vote was important enough to keep Michael Johns in last week. Yet, I was very, very wrong.